10 Ways a New Mom Is Like a Toddler

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When a new baby arrives, many moms feel anxious that the constant demands of the newborn will create distance between them and their older child. Rest assured, that phase is temporary, and your expanded family will soon find a new balance.

And in the meantime, new mama, take comfort in the fact that you and your toddler suddenly have more in common than ever before! Let’s review:

10) Rational emotional responses are unlikely. Did Dad forget to pick up more cereal on his way home? Is a favorite shirt in the dirty laundry pile? Is the sky a little too blue today? If you answered yes to any of these questions, there is a new mom and/or toddler out there somewhere having a total freaking meltdown right now.  

9) Clothing is optional. Toddlers love to feel free and uninhibited, and that includes stripping down to their birthday suits without hesitation. For a new mom, clothing seems unnecessary when your baby NEVER. STOPS. EATING. (And then spits up all over you afterward anyway.)

8) Spelling, math skills, complex logic? That’s asking too much. For new moms and toddlers, it’s best to keep things simple. Board books, Daniel Tiger’s Neighborhood, and Raffi are appropriate for the toddler. Celebrity gossip magazines, reality TV, and most of the Taylor Swift catalog are just the right speed for the new-mom brain.

7) Bathing is a low priority. Daily shower or bath? You and your toddler now agree that’s a time-suck that can be reduced to every two or three days.

6) Diapers. Most toddlers need them. After giving birth, most new moms do, too. Enough said.

5) When Daddy gets home, the celebration begins. For the toddler, this includes knockdown hugs and squeals of delight. For mom, this includes handing Daddy the newborn the second he’s through the door, and breathing a sigh of relief that another grown-up is finally around.

4) Poop is a constant topic. Toddlers love talking about poop, whether their own or that of other people. New moms might wish they could avoid talking about poop, but after the 10th newborn diaper change before noon, good luck ignoring it.

3) One word: Hangry. Toddlers and new moms (especially nursing moms) eat fast and furiously, and seem to live in perpetual fear that the next meal won’t come. Woe to the person who stands in the way of a toddler or new mom when hunger kicks in.

2) Bedtimes are a big deal. If a toddler misses his bedtime, it’s bad news all around. Same goes for a new mom who can look forward to multiple nightly wake-ups from her tiny human alarm clock. Rule of thumb: if the clock has hit double-digits, both a toddler and new mom are up too late.

1) Snuggling is NOT optional. Sometimes all a toddler or new mom needs is a big hug.

Editor’s note: This article originally published on September 19, 2017.

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