My third baby was breech. When my OB told me that meant C-section, I told her I was sure he’d turn around in time. I went home and did all sorts of yoga poses aimed at helping him get his head down. But at exactly 37 weeks, I called because I didn’t feel him moving as much as usual. Monitoring showed that labor was on its way…and he was still breech. I even had a procedure done to try to manually turn him around, but that didn’t work either. It was time for surgery. 

After two vaginal deliveries without complications and a healthy pregnancy, I had not given the possibility of a C-section much thought. So going into the procedure, I didn’t know much. Here are three things I didn’t expect to experience after having a C-section.

My Baby Didn’t Smell Like My Baby

The first time I kissed my newborn on the top of his little head, I immediately noticed his scent. I can only describe what I smelled as something that didn’t belong to me. 

The sense of smell is both subtle and powerful. When I brought my first two babies’ heads to my lips, I never actually thought to myself, “This smells like my baby,” but I noticed immediately that my third child did not smell familiar. 

Turns out I’m not the only one who had this experience. I’m assuming it’s related to the fact that babies born by C-section bypass the birth canal, whereby they do not pick up their mother’s microbiome. 

Gradually, after several weeks of breastfeeding, my baby did take on that intoxicating baby smell.

Recovery Was Brutal 

C-section recovery challenged my body in a way I never experienced before. 

Pain rose and fell in waves throughout the four days I spent in the hospital. There was one spot on the left side of my incision that hurt me so much I was doubled over and in tears. 

Swelling in my legs and feet also hurt me badly. I had to go home in my socks because there was no way to get my shoes on. The swelling lasted weeks, leading to pain in my feet that worsened at night. 

Pain, swelling, and tenderness persisted for a long time. I found it emotionally difficult to bear what had “happened to me” too. I was afraid to look at my scar or take off the belly band they put on me at the hospital. Even my posture was affected as I unconsciously began to protect the incision area. 

Here’s what really hit me hard: surgery wasn’t a biological event that my body recognized, like my first two births. This time, my abdomen had been sliced open. It didn’t feel like a natural process—it just felt like a severe injury. 

I Grieved the Birth Process That I Didn’t Have

I never expected to feel sad about not going through labor, especially since I am one of those people who screams bloody murder through every contraction. But, as difficult as it is, birth is transcendent and empowering for me. It gives me a sense of who I am and what I’m capable of on a plane where biology meets spirituality. I do grieve the fact that I couldn’t experience it in the same way with my son. 

After having three children, I have learned there’s no easy way. Like my grandma told me when I was pregnant with my first, it got in, and now it’s got to come out. Each of my births pushed me past my limits in different ways and taught me different things about myself. All I have to say is, a C-section is not the easy way out!